The Goal of Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

The goal of narcissistic abuse recovery is to close the gap of vulnerability. When there is a vulnerability, it leaves you open to all kinds of manipulation. The vulnerability manifests as a lack of boundary function, people-pleasing, unhealed trauma, and a need for external validation.

The gap of vulnerability is the space through which abusers can manipulate and get you under their control.

Narcissists and psychopaths have a sixth sense of who they can target. They will instinctively act on this sense about someone and test them for narcissistic supply by scanning body language and gauging responses. They are skilled at successfully hypnotising their targets into the induction period while breaking down boundaries without too much resistance. Poor boundary function and vulnerability are the dreams of a manipulator. It allows the narcissist to progress to the devaluation phase of the abuse cycle. They will test the waters for this very early on.

Psychological abuse is only possible when one is not aware of what is happening to them. They do not have the knowledge and terminology to identify manipulative behaviours. Even if their subconscious recognises that something is off, denial as a defence mechanism protects them from the truth.

Denial is shattered through brutal force when what one sees cannot be unseen. When the target starts enforcing boundaries, it denies the abuser access to keep abusing them. As a parasitic entity, the abuser has to move on and find a new source of energy that does not understand what is happening to them. It is how abusers operate and function in the world. They depend on unconsciousness as a way to keep abusing people.

The heightened sense of vulnerability in the aftermath of narcissistic abuse means that most people inevitably fall back into familiar patterns with abusive and toxic people. If you recognise it quicker than you would have before – you are making progress.

Closing the gap does not happen overnight.

It is an ongoing process of rewiring deep subconscious programming.

Every time you progress, you retrieve a piece of yourself that you lost to the narcissistic abuser. You will begin to naturally reject abusive behaviour because you have the self-respect to know that you do not tolerate it anymore. When an abuser is trying to violate your boundaries, you will understand the rules of non-engagement and swiftly remove them from your life.

It is the most foundational work of recovery that will set you up for success.

Each time you learn to connect with and trust your intuition, the gap of vulnerability gets smaller. It is a process of strengthening boundary function and finding internal validation. You find internal validation by disconnecting from external sources of it. When you disconnect from external sources, you have no choice but to start cultivating it yourself.

The gap of vulnerability does not just apply to narcissists. It applies to any toxic or abusive individual lacking in integrity who pushes your boundaries and does not align with your values. There is no shortage of such people in this world – and the devastating experience of narcissistic abuse allows you to define your values and the kind of people you want to have in your life.

When you close the gap in vulnerability, you close the door to abusive and painful experiences. The more you tell the universe what you do not want in life anymore – the more it starts delivering what you do. If there is still space for toxic people and abusers to manipulate you, they will keep showing up in your experience until you integrate the unhealed trauma and the lesson.

Narcissistic abuse is a psychic phenomenon where the narcissist hooks into your pain and feeds off it like a vampire. An energetic cord connects you to the narcissist, and your unhealed trauma keeps it alive. You need to fully identify and heal core wounding stemming from multiple beliefs, traumas, and events in your life. Because ultimately, this is what the narcissist honed in on from the beginning and then used against you. When you integrate the trauma, you will cut the energetic cord. The narcissist will no longer exist in your energy field and will be a distant memory.

Narcissists seek out vulnerabilities in people and exploit them. It is the only way this dynamic can work. Closing the gap involves healing within you the parts that make you susceptible to handing your power away to abusers. When these parts are identified and made conscious – they lose the hold they once had over you.

Narcissism is Wetiko’s consciousness. It controls people through these unconscious blind spots in the human psyche. That is how narcissistic abuse can operate at an interpersonal and collective level in the hidden and unseen.

Wetiko drives people to complete insanity.

It has a way of blinding you to madness when you are in it.

It is why an outsider can see an abusive relationship clearly, yet the victim cannot. It is why the freedom movement can see the abuse and tyranny in the world now, yet the rest of the population cannot. Because narcissistic abuse is not logical – it is psychic and spiritual, targeting the most vulnerable parts within us.

You have to disconnect from Wetiko’s consciousness to regain your sanity. This distorted and inverted consciousness will distort and invert your reality. It will entangle you with its chaotic mindset, and you will become distorted like it. Turn off the tv, mainstream media, and politics. Block all avenues of contact with a narcissist in your personal life. If you have to engage, become the observer, not the absorber.

You will begin to rebalance and gain clarity because you have disconnected from the vibration of fear.

The vibration of fear keeps us locked into a state of disempowerment. Fear is the ultimate currency of any controlling force because it causes people to be submissive and let their boundaries down. Narcissists will manipulate the fear of death, fear of rejection, fear of being alone, and fear of being not good enough, to name a few. Where there is core wounding of some sort – there is a gap of vulnerability for Wetiko to infiltrate.

Our individual and collective shadow work is what leads to freedom and liberation. You can stay under the hypnotic spell if you wish – but you will keep being met with a reminder because the universe is trying to show you something that goes much deeper than the controlling narcissists. The universe is trying to free you from the shackles of narcissistic abuse so you can learn to stand tall. It is the experience that mirrors the subconscious back to you so that you can become fully aware of it.

The only way out of narcissistic abuse is to face your own soul.

You have to face the shadow self to liberate yourself from the darkness.

For one-on-one support with narcissistic abuse recovery, you can book here or send me a DM on Instagram at beyondtheillusion.co